DSC04281

K#8|Things

This post is dedicated to showing you a little bit of Korea. I have not been out shooting pictures a lot (surprisingly), but here are some things that I did get. 

Click on the image to enlarge. At the end of this post I have a brief description of what each image is. 

DSC04281

DSC04261

DSC04300

 DSC04278

Korea9

Korea8

Korea7

Korea6

DSC04307

 korea10

korea11

DSC04271

korea12

1.View from the top of a local “mountain” (really more like a hill actually); an overview of Sungtan.

2. Here I captured two of Korea’s extremes, both objects of which are very prevalent here: Barbwire and dragonflies. 

3. One of the many local hiking trails. 

4. Wildflowers. 

5. Cute bakery food. 

6. Umbrellas on market day. 

7. market day. 

8. Korean Dunkin Donut. 

9. One of the many local pagodas. 

10. Gardens everywhere!

11. Cute Advertising 

12. Blue phone booths and scooters. 

13. The yummiest gummies I’ve ever eaten (in the shape of alphabet letters!) 

 
IMG_4102

K#7|Wheels

IMG_4102

Have you ever watched a wheel

circle round and round?

it doesn’t stop for anything 

it has a mind of its own. 

On one half of the cycle 

you find yourself looking up 

where on the opposite end 

you haven’t an ounce of luck.

One season you may be learning something,

The next you may be free

but peace doesn’t last forever 

because the wheel keeps on turning, you see? 

You will never get to a standing point

where you’re strong through and through 

You only get stronger as experience the trials life gives to you. 

Every time the wheel turns there is something else to learn

We won’t arrive until we understand the terms, 

in which life operates and as I’ve said before 

The wheel we call time, you see 

Stops for no one. 

images

So here we now find ourselves going round and round

This carousel is moving fast; the horses go up and down 

What do we do while we sit and and ride this necessary ride 

There is no used in trying to stop it; trust me, time isn’t to be tried. 

What I’ve learned, if anything, from my little time being alive 

is that you can’t control anything except what you believe inside. 

The wheel keep spinning, and it won’t stop 

for anyone, not even you 

I have found a way to make the most of it all, 

Is by picking good thoughts to choose. 

swing-carousel-tivoli-copenhagen-4223301478-800x533

The trail of little goods you do will leave a happy affect 

on this weary world thats full of sadness and regret. 

Striving to be perfect is the ultimate lost cause 

You end up running your life into the ground 

without enjoying any part. 

Do your best, learn to love and give and be a light 

For the wheel won’t stop for anyone 

not even for the sake of time. 

You never stop learning 

There is never a finish line 

You just keep of going- 

rolling into time. 

Abandoned-6-Flags-fade-to-black

( I do not own any of these photos except the first one)

 

Korea4

K#6| Pretty Asian Ladies

Korea4

Asian women are very famous for their flawless skin. it doesn’t take a cosmetic genius to observe that. The reason it is such a noticeable ‘stereotype’ is because the asian culture(s) praise women for their flawless skin (and tiny bodies and expensive clothes, and fashionable shoes and on and on the standards go).

But pale complexion is a big thing for them (yay!) and most asian women put a lot of time and effort into maintaining that supple, soft, youthful glow. 

If you’ve been around my blog before, you may have stumbled upon this article where I talked about how to take care of your skin. 

Just to summarize that post, the main and most important thing to do in order to maintain beautiful skin is to establish a healthy lifestyle by eating well, drinking enough water, exercising and sleeping well. Those are the key things for accomplishing basically any and all cosmetic/beauty/health goals you might have. 

Its a wheel that keeps going, you never stop living right if you want great health a beauty. 

Asian women already apply all of those things. The food they eat is real and very nutritious (ever heard of kimchi?), hiking is a common activity here, along with the constant walking that is required to get form A – B on a daily basis. 

Their lifestyles are pretty much already great, but there are additional things they do to nourish their skin, keeping is white a supple, and that is what I’m going to write about here today. 

Pretty Asian Lady How To

Asian women have flawless porcelain skin from head to toe. Today we’re going to focus on the head (happy faces!). 

On a daily basis in addition to healthy lifestyle, Asian women 

  • Protect their skin from the sun 
  • Keep their faces clean 
  • Usage of organic and natural products (double yay!)
  • Plus some time old DIY masks on a weekly basis. 

:D :D 

Sun

Hyper exposure to the sun is dangerous and counter productive if you’re trying to maintain a snowy complexion. 

It is recommended across the board by homeopathic/holistic doctors that you need  15 minutes of sun on your face every day for optimum vitamin D absorption. I don’t want to mislead you by saying that the sun is evil and that you need to live in a dark cave your whole life hiding from it. 

lol!

But what you can do to protect yourself from over exposure and discoloration of the skin is:

1) Wear a sun hat

2) Use an UV protective parasol 

3) wear long sleeves (even in summer!)

4) Put on a safe (preferable organic/natural) facial SPF moisturizer in the A.M. (and as needed through out the day)

Clean: The Routine 

Most articles I read on asian women skin care concluded that they are religious about their skin care routines. Most of them are similar to mine actually! Thats a cool feeling.

B-)

Basically, if I were a fly on the bathroom mirror in any Asian women’s bathroom, her daily beauty rituals would look something like this: 

Wake up  your face with hot clean washcloth. Press steaming rag onto skin for 1 minute to open up pors. Wash with a gentle non-foaming cleanser. Tone with diluted 1 part witch-hazel, 1 part distilled water (add a drop of essential oils for extra refreshment), or any toner you normally use. Then, moisturize with an organic/natural/safe facial SPF moisturizer. 

Apply makeup (man, do they love  make over here!). 

Go on with your day. 

Before Bed start with another hot washcloth pressed to your face. Wipe off makeup (the hot rag usually does the trick. If not, then use your favorite makeup remover). *Exfoliate skin with your favorite exfoliant (or a cool DIY recipe). Rinse with warm water. Pat face semi-dry. Apply a nourishing mask (the link above or scroll down for some Asian inspires recipes below). I like to let my masks rest for at least 30 minutes, but most people will agree that 15 minutes is sufficient.* Rinse with warm water and pat face dry. Apply either a night cream or any other organic/natural/safe hydrating moisturizer. I often apply coconut oil to my face before I go to bed, and in the morning it has all been absorbed (but I have really dry skin.. so try with caution!). 

*Don’t do this everyday lest you skin start to hyper produce oil! Ew! Once weekly is plenty. *

What They Buy** are many many different things. I’ve watched many helpful videos and have read many helpful articles on the subject and the possibilities are endless (and predominately organic/natural! <3). I’ve found that most beauticians will agree that you need to shop around and try things for yourself, keeping in mind that words like Organic, natural, and sensitive skin are words you want to keep at the forefront of your mind. 

I found some things at a local shop here that I’ll share with you!

korea3

Clockwise from top left corner:

1. “Hello mini mini hand cream; so small, so cute, so moist” by DMK

2. “SunGuard Cream SPF 40/PA++ Dream of a fairy Princess A pleasant beauty life of a natural science” by Flory Ann (for the face)

3. “C&O sun BB* SPF 50/PA++” by Organic Farm  (for the face)

4.”Pure Natural BB* Magic Cream Precious Skin” by Organic Farm (for the face)

5. “Regeneration Mask with Snail extract” by Leaders Clinic 

6. “Pure Cotton Mask Sheet” in Potato (for whitening!!), Green tea and Cucumber by Organic Farm

7.”Curling Rubber Mascara” by Organic Farm 

8. “Natural real moisture Hair mask Sample” by Happy Bath

Some more popular brands are Skin Food, NexCare, Innisfree, Back to Baby, Too Cool For School, Elite Cream, and I am sure there are many many more that I am ignorant of. . I’m eager to get my hands on them!!

*Read these articles about the history and wonders of BB creams*

**Three common whitening agents to look for: niacin-amide, retirioic acid and kojic acid**

Do It Yourself for a fraction of the price! If you know anything about me, you know that I am slightly  obsessed with anything DIY beauty related. :D 

I’ve learned a few things that these asian beauty’s like to do, and luckily you can find what you need inside your kitchen! 

Pretty Asian Whitening Masks

For brightening, whitening, and hydrating  your skin. 

 Lemon and Yogurt 

1 part fresh lemon juice and 1 part plain organic yogurt. Apply to skin and let stand for no less than 15 minutes. Rinse with warm water. 

Special Kelp Mask 

2 T flour (more natural the better), 1 T olive oil, egg yolk, H2o, dried kelp, and milk. You want about 1/4-1/3 cup. of dried kelp. Soak it in water for a few minutes to rid any excess sodium. Rinse and set in a small bowl. Pour milk over dried kelp, just enough to barely cover it. Pour kelp and milk into a small blender until kelp is very finely chopped (the finer the better). Add flour, egg yolk and olive oil. Pulse until combine. 

Rice Flour Mask* **

1 part rice flour (brown is best but white is fine), and 1 part raw honey, green tea bag, steeped. Blend first two ingredients together in a small dish. Squeeze tea form the bag into the mixture. Blend well and brush generous layer onto face. Let set for 30 minutes. 

*If there is any leftover, you can add 1 heaping spoonful of sugar and use as an exfoliator! * 

**rice flour is a very common ingredient in most asian beauty products. It is safe and natural and cheap! It can be used as a blotter- to absorb sweat and oil on your face. Brush it with a fluffy brush to coat your face. It won’t add color and it is light weight, but it really does the job. **

Other things they do

Facial Messages.

066

(click to photo to watch a very informative video on how to message your face!)

It is very common to find face massagers, much like an ordinary back messager on a wand back home, at local corner stores. Messaging the face gets the blood flowing and bring energy to your face, while relieving accumulative tension you hold in your jaw and brow line. 

I hope you have learned something and will toy with some of these new ideas and recipes. 

Its never good to be obsessive, but it is good to be proactive. 

:D

Your skin is the largest organ in your body, so lets treat it right and make it happy! 

 

DSC04216

K#5| Reasons to eat Kimchi

Kimchi.

Yummy.

Spicy.

Good for me.

Kimchi.

I have been playing the part of a native very convincingly here. When we went to Costco last week, I bought a huge bag of bean sprouts, a huge case of dried seaweed (YUMMO!), a bag of frozen broccoli and a bag of frozen chicken. Besides my round blue eyes and denser build and freckled complexion (and curly hair), you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between me and a native. ;) *wink

I’m trying my best to avoid eating american food while I’m here. I want to be fully immersed in the culture while I’m visiting and it isn’t very convincing if I’m sitting in the McDonalds with free wifi in one hand and a McFlurry in the other.

Although, usage of free wifi (which is every where) is actually a very  Korean thing to do.

DSC04205

To all of my cool family members who so faithfully follow my bloggy-poo, here is my confession of my conformation to the Korean cultural obsession with kimchi (and some very propelling reasons as to why  I have conformed to the prominent Korean culture’s obsessive consumption).

Let me first preface this article by saying that I actually did not hop on this Kimchi band wagon while I was back home. In fact, my sister who works at a vitamin shop (ironically owned by koreans) first gave me the heads up to try the mystical stuff once I came over here right before I left.

I didn’t know anything about it and was not aware of the apparent superpowers it has.

But after doing my own research and having developed an understanding of what  kimchi is and how it helps your body, I was unavoidably inspired to fall for it and join in the kimchi brigade parade.

Here are some reasons why I think that you too should incorporate kimchi into your lifestyle too!

FOUR VERY GOOD REASONS TO INCLUD KIMCHI IN YOUR DAILY LIFESTYLE 

kkakdugi

(Radish Kimchi *I don’t own this photo*)

1. Cultured food is GOLD for your GUT Because our food in America is basically fake (read more about the corruption in the food industry and FDA here!), our bodies are developing all sorts of sensitivities  to some staple things because they are hyper produced (dairy, soy, corn, wheat, gluten) and used as fillers instead of nutrients for our bodies, and poisoned with preservatives to crank out quantity and shelf life vs. quality and human life.

The reason this is bad (eating fake food that is) is because our bodies don’t have the active enzymes and probiotics found in real food anymore. Our bodies need  real food and their enzymes and minerals to properly digest and absorb the nutrients from our food so we can function properly, thrive and enjoy life. 

And that is where Kimchi comes into play.

Kimchi is a super sonic cultured food rich in those active enzymes and probiotics what we so desperately need to line our stomachs with so that we have a healthy immune system and strong digestive capabilities (more that 70% of Americans suffer form chronic constipation!)

A happy gut is a happy body. Read this article to learn more about the importance of a healthy bacteria, probiotic filled tummy.

Other cultured foods you could incorporate into your lifestyle are plain yogurt, organic apple cider vinegar, sauerkraut, kombucha, Kiefer, and many more!

 

DSC04408

(An Agama making many different kinds of Kimchi at the market today!)

2. PRO-biotics! Kimchi has 1000 times more of lactobacillus (probiotics) than what yogurt has. ONE.THOUSAND.TIMES.MORE. Thats, ONE. ZERO. ZERO.ZERO.

oi-2Bkimchi

(Very yummy cucumber kimchi *I don’t own this photo*)

3. Metabolic Madness Kimchi aides in boosting your metabolism (can I get an imaginary high five please?). Because of this boost, often times the result is in weight loss. B-)

DSC04228

(Yesterday’s lunch-standard cabbage and radish kimchi)

4. Anti-Caner proporties Yay! read more about this topic here! Diet is the best medicine. Be proactive and make good choices today (and tomorrow, and the day after that etc…)

When your body is constantly exposed to something that it is allergic to, regardless of the severity of your reaction, your body gets exhausted. When your body is exhausted, your immune system shuts down and you get sick, and your body doesn’t function properly.

For me  this process was subtle, but accumulative and has been a big problem for me most of my life (food sensitivities).

Applying these truths in my life have already made a small difference (not long into the new routine..). I know form my past that I am impatient and have run many ‘great ideas’ in the ground because I wanted the results NOW. Which is why I’ve never had any success with my endeavors!

We need to have a balanced diet. Proteins, legumes, veggies, fruits, good fats and oils, all of it! We need to out weigh the fake food we eat with the real food  that you’re going to start eating. Our bodies were created to handle foreign things, but when we constantly feed our bodies those foreign things (hydrogenated oils, refined grains and sugars, GMO anything) our bodies get tired and overwhelmed, weak, susceptible, and inflamed.

Although you may be compelled to just dive in huge bat of kimchi and soak it in through your pores (no? really? thats just me?), the best way to approach this happy new information is to eat a little bit everyday. Be consistent about it and let it become part of your life.

It already has become a part of mine!

:D

Take what you need never with greed, and thank God everyday for the freedom you have to buy these nutritious foods for your body. Thank God for variety and beauty and ask Him for wisdom on how you need to change your lifestyle- how can you feed yourself in a way the honors him (1 Cor. 10:31).

Korea2

(Kimchi on market day!)

If you’d like to read more about the superpowers of kimchi, here is a good article all about it!

 

 

DSC04186

K#4|Not Much.

DSC04186

Good morning!

It is 9:37am. Today the sky is clear (as it has been overcast *yay!* for he past few days), and I am openly dreading the anticipated heat that this clear skies and shining sun promise.

I know that I should  be happy to welcome the sun, but I much prefer a melancholy order of things.

Nonetheless, today is promising to be a good day.

I’ve been doing the worst thing that probably any aspiring artist could do.

I’ve been watching old movies.

Lots of old movies.

The type of movies that fuel my fiery passion for pursing acting (little known fact about moi). You watch them and then end up with a broken heart because they are so wonderful that you wish you were part of it and it hurts that you are not (nor can be).

Its  bad also because I fuel up on inspiration with no way to channel it out! Like a cold brick of awe-inspiring admiration just settles in your gut for days.

Its like being constipated with creativity. (Crude, but actually a terribly effective illustration!)

Studying the way they move and speak- the way they create such amazing characters with particular mannerisms and quarks. I used to think that acting was just a walk in the park. And in some ways, based off of what little studying I’ve done, it is. In fact, there is a great danger in over thinking your lines or your character. Your body can become petrified and  your thoughts become stagnant. You get lost and confused and forget the whole reasons you’re acting in the first place, which is of course because you love it.

Something you love should be enjoyable and we make it so un-enjoyable for ourselves more often than not on account of perfectionism.

I am not a professional, and I don’t play one of TV. My statements are based off of observation and only some  youtube lessons I’ve had.

I still think it is a valid opinion and I hope very much that I will not fall into that trap.

But acting is hard. It is hard to truly and really be believable. That is what takes the practice.

Jimmy Stewart (<3), one of the greatest American actors of all time, honorary patriot and inspiring man of God once said that “the key to good acting is to forget that you’re acting at all”.

Don’t panic over memorizing the script or else you’ll lose all feeling in your character’s lines. The lines are tools for the actor to use to help covey the character- we’re just storytellers. A glorified story teller anyway.

You have to be believable. You have to deliver a scene that people want to watch. You can’t be painful or stiff. You have to be relaxed and natural.

These are the things that I need to learn how to do. I recite lines to myself form my favorite plays all the time and from my perspective, I sound very stiff and shallow. I know  what I want to sound like, but for some reason I cannot speak how I want to.

I am eager to get back home so that I can crack the code and carry on with my pursuits.

I often feel  like it is too late. I’ll never be able to achieve my goals and I’ve blown my whole life. But then I read about the lives of my favorite actors (Stewart, Gable, and many of the other classic artists) and they started their careers in acting after collage. In fact, most of these people had different pursuits in mind and just stumbled upon acting and stuck with it.

I’ve wanted to try this my whole life, and just because I haven’t doesn’t mean that I can’t!

What if I didn’t think of being a actress until yesterday. What if my desire was really that new- would I shoot myself down for not having thought of it sooner? No!

I live in a culture obsessed with youth. And I have unknowingly accepted these lies and have been beaten up by them.

The truth is James Stewart finished collage, dabbled in acting, went on to be very very active and ranking in the US Air Force, came back to acting, retired for that then went on to be a deacon at is church.

He died at 89 with a very imactful legacy trailed behind him. He lead a life that people noticed because he had integrity, ambition, and a noticeable good heart.

he didn’t think too highly of himself and I think that is the key. The key to anything.

Not just good acting, but success in general.

I’ve said it before, but it is worth repeating:

‘Don’t think less of yourself, but think of yourself less.’

That is humility.

I pick on Jimmy because he  is  my favorite actor (a very close second is Clark Gable). I know that sounds cliche, but for what it is worth, I’ve admired them before I knew that they were as big as they were.

eh, who cares.

It isn’t a competition anyway.

These posts have turned into more of a journal entry type of thing. So if at any moment you get bored of my rambles, I hope that you will excuse yourself and be on with your day.

I am 20 and 8 months. Here is where i have to make the choice to believe that I do have more time ahead of me even though it feels like most of my time has passed. I have so much that i want to give. I want to do so many things. I want to leave a legacy on this earth. I often feel like I’ve been lazy and ineffective.

My most propionate fear is that I’ll run my life into the ground by not doing anything that I want to do. I mean that not in a sense of being scared that I won’t  get what I want. I mean it to say that I won’t give what I want because what I want to do is give.That is the heartbeat of who  I am. I want to give what I have to inspire people. I want to be able to inspire people to do good and want to leave their own good mark on this world, too.

That all starts now though, by leading a godly life here in the everyday scene.

These scenes I get to practice over and over and over again, playing an extra in everyone else’s lives, and the leading lady in my own. I get to practice being kind, patient, angry but not sinful, grateful and giving. I get to practice these parts every waking moment. Every thought captive (2 cor. 10:5), not conforming to this world, but being transformed by the renewing of my mind (romans 12).

Those are the hardest things to do because it is so unnatural to think of yourself less.

Whenever I get fed up or aggravated with the whole thing, I just remember that God is trying to make me Holy, not happy.

ouch.

My dream still sleeps now, but until I can get where I want to be, I practice the mundane things and pray for open doors and encounters with the right people- people to help me get where I want to be. I am ignorant and vulnerable. I need people to help me along the way- I’m really trying to learn to trust Him with it all.. which is hard because I want to be productive and do what I can to get where I want to be, but that isn’t the way He operates.

If I want to give, I need to start by giving what I have now in preparation to give what I’ll have later. If I want to inspire people in a big way, I have to practice by inspiring those close to me now.

It is hard to ignore the pulsing desires of my ambitions pounding in my heart. All I want to do is let them out and chase them to the top. But I must be patient and wait on the Lord. I have to be intentional about trusting that He sees it all and knows my heart better than I do. He has made me on purpose and does have a plan and purpose for my life.

I must keep my eyes on eternal things and not be consumed by this materialistic world I’m in, no matter how loudly my heart may pound.

I believe I’ll accomplish my goals. I really do.

But I won’t get anywhere worrying or over thinking or trying to control the situations.

it hasn’t helped in the past, and it won’t help now or in the future.

Everything is in His hands, which means that He sees the way my life is going to be plotted out based off of my decisions and choices along the way.

So I guess I do have control over most of my life- I get to control how I think and what I believe, which is the hardest yet most noble task for anybody to do.

You’re a hero if you conquer your own mind, combatting lies with godly, sound, biblical truth.

I hope that my pursuit for nobility will infect every area of my life and those around me whether I’m in Atlanta, Korea, New York, Los Angels, Switzerland, Nashville, in my car, at work, at home or on a walk.

DSC04187

10:44 am.

 

 

DSC04086.jpg

K#3| Ella Hey hey

Raining in Seoul.

DSC04086.jpg

DSC04084.jpg

Everybody is out- perfect sunday afternoon.

DSC04082.jpg

DSC04088.jpg

Kinda how I felt the day we flew into the country last week..

DSC04097.jpg

DSC04089.jpg

DSC04087.jpg

…Aaaannd this is probably one of my favorite pictures i’ve ever taken.

DSC04081.jpg

I attended a church service in Seoul today.

During the service I gleaned from the ponderings that I’ve so rapidly pondered this week.

One prominent thought that sortta settled in my heart was this concept of choice. The theory that we humans have total and complete control over nothing in this world except over our choices.

A choice I made, by an act of my will, completely unaccompanied by any emotional extravaganza, was to believe that God is near me (James 4:8), that He cares about me (1 peter 5:7) and that He does know what He is doing in my life (jeremiah 29:11).

Although I don’t feel  like I can trust Him, or though I feel  like I have to make things happen for myself if I wish to get anywhere in my life, the truth is simply put: I can and I don’t.

I can trust Him because the Bible says I can (proverbs 3:5-6). I don’t have to make my way because He has already set my paths straight (delight yourself in the Lord etc…Ps. 37:4, jer 29:11, Ephesians 1:4).

Not to mention that the fruit of my labor (worrying and not trusting God) has made me chronically stresses and continuously dissatisfied with  my  choices.

Why do I keep thinking that I know better than Him?

Plus, all of my anxiety has contributed NOTHING to my progress towards goals and aspirations (Jesus said it well in Matthew 6). Its only adding more stress.

But I don’t like being idol. I often feel passive just ‘believing’ that what i want out of this life will just ‘happen’ and that all I need to do is sit back, relax and watch my life make itself.

*sigh

Theres has gotta be a better why to look at this. Where is the balance?

As long as I am living and  maintaining a constant pursuit of nobility and righteousness (in other words, letting the work of Christ in me overflow form my heart and penetrate my actions, values and beliefs and affect those around me), I am secure underneath His “umbrella” of protection/promises (2 John 1:6, Psalm 19:11).

God loves you if you’re not living the right way.

He died for you, me, him and her.

You can’r argue that (John 3:16).

But his heart is for the broken; orphaned and widowed. His heart is for His children. His people. The ones who are alive to Him; the obedient ones. Anyone who should call upon the Lord will be saved (romans 10), but until you make that choice, you’re not underneath His umbrella of protection and you’re not heir to the rich promises here and those to come. (read Revelation).

The gospel without right living is just hypocrisy. But right living without the gospel is just legalism. You can’t pick one or the the other. Its a heart thing. It’s deeper than a smile on sunday morning, and more pulsing than a catchy rock– I mean–worship song on the radio. Its the work of Christ in us, changing our core beliefs in a powerful way by speaking the truth to us in our hearts in a soft spoken, authoritative tone (John 8:32).

You call, and He answers. He honors a heart that is hungry for truth.

I panic and whine and grumble and pout because  I’m doing everything I can to be better and to live fuller but I still feel lost, unimportant, aimless, unloved, forgotten, useless, worthless and discouraged. 

But it isn’t about what I’m doing or feeling. That brings the focus on me; Skylar. 

It is about what He did and does and is doing for me.

He is following me every step I take, holding an umbrella over my head, whether I feel  it or not. Who knows what He actively protecting me from as I walk through each day.

I wax and wain; I am not  perfect. Funny though because He didn’t ask me to be.

I pray and ask for wisdom and guidance towards the path of righteousness. I have an honest, imperfect heart that longs  to be what it cannot (perfect). But God hears it beating and knows that it is true, and tough my faith is that of maybe 1/2 of a mustard seed at most times, I know that He see what little good is in me and He is working on that little glint deep beneath the rubble so it will soon (or not so soon) over shine my flesh so I may live in full  freedom and power of the holy Spirit.

And I won’t start the next phrase with “until then” because there is no “until then”. I will never have a perfect heart. Not on this earth. This cycle of testing and resting will go on until my body dies.

Along the way it is my job is to not conform to this world (romans 12, 1 John 2:15-17), and live in obedience by walking in love (matthew 22:36-40, 2 John 1:6).

Along the way I pray that I will be an influence in some way in somebody’s life.

If I ignore God, and agree to hold myself more important than the work He has for me, then He will ignore me and move onto another heart that is more willing serve.

Then I will have missed it.

Funny, none of those ‘tasks’ are passive, but very intentional, constant and hard.

Ironically, I have  been idol in my my mind. I’ve been doing exactly what I was afraid of. I am depleted because I am not doing  the work He has given me to do. I want more but I am throwing away the opportunities He has already given me to practice loving people and trusting Him.

These last two posts have been rough drafts of rambling thoughts that have me brewing in my mind. I cannot seem to express them with eloquence, but it is nice to have the convenience of typing them out.

I don’t really care if I do ramble (well, that is only partly true.. I don’t want to bore you!). But I cannot be so consumed with what my readers (Hi Mom! Hey Jenny and Aunt Jayne!) think of me in my reckless state.

:/

Back to the umbrella.

My heart is hardened to the reality of God being near to me and caring for me. I cannot see it very well and I need an awakening! I know  I am lavishly blessed and loved, but I don’t feel  it.

Which brings us full circle, right back to choices (where was I going with the umbrella analogy here?).

Believing what the Bible says vs. what our hearts are screaming at us (Jeremiah 17:6) is an active choice you make over and over (romans 12, 2 chronicles 10:5) and I haven’t been doing that which is probably why I’ve been in “The pit of yuck” lately (“Jungle Jam reference.. anybody? Anybody?).

I need to hold onto the reality of His love/care/plan/purpose for me and trust that He is following me with His umbrella.

Little my faith may be (Matthew 17:20), BUT, the truth is that He is looking at my heart- a heart that is growing in obedience out of Love for Him.

It is a slow process, but as it keeps on raining, He is there with the umbrella to walk with my through the storms.

I just have to believe.

oui..

Choose.

DSC04105.jpg

P.S.

The rain was a HUGE blessing today.

I also finally  had my first bubble tea!

I’m officially a native now.

Sorry Mom, I have to stay!

DSC04075.jpg

 

DSC03989

K#2|Heartbeat of Songtan

DSC03994

Every day at 3:00 and every night at 8:00 the heartbeat of Sungtan springs up form the ground and plays a song, and the locals dance to it well after it has reached its crescendo, and off into the night and on into their dreams.

DSC03989

The song I heard was my favorite song I think I’ve ever heard. It was nothing like anything I’ve listened to back home in the states.

DSC03971

Like most things (if not everything) in this culture, this song was a community song- a community effort. Everybody played a part and added something special to it.

DSC03990

The shared joy of the onlookers as we watched the adorable  kids stand together, arm and arm, around the circumference of the monstrous underground water fountain. Their anticipatory giggles rumbled and set the rhythm to the melody that was about to begin. Once the waters (finally!) sprung forth from the ground at the tick of 8, their laughter busted out in a similar manner and poured out in the air,  infecting the hearts of every person there.

DSC03974

The beads of water echoed throughout the park as they congregated in the puddles made from the ruts in the well worn ‘dance floor’.

DSC03988

The heartbeat of this town came alive. The essence of community- one heart, one laugh, one song. Foot steps pattering here and there, little ones slipping with an immediate hand to help them up. Older women and men looking, with a gleam in their eye.

DSC03978

We were all scorched by the miserable heat. Despite our many many  differences, when you come to the water, looking to be refreshed, the differences disappear and for a moment we are all brother and sister; friend without foes.

DSC03980

It was bizarre to see such a wealth of love and joy in a community. Maybe the refreshing sensation of the cold water on our stinging skin is what allowed our best(s) to surface.

I’m probably over romanticizing things.

I usually do.

DSC04002

But it is nice to imagine that this song plays all the time;

The quartet of laughter, set by the tempo of dancing feet, and hearts that swelled with the excess happiness from the children as they effervescently exuded it.

Giggles and cackles were left in the puddles, seeping in the cracks of brick. I liked sitting on the ground because I it was almsot like I could partake in the absorption of excess joy.

DSC03987

Their laughter stained my heart for the night, and I replayed the song in my head over and over. I let it lull me to sleep and I slept soundly until the heavy heat woke me again the next morning.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 53 other followers

%d bloggers like this: